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Do People Deserve A Second Chance...?

Everybody makes mistakes at some point in his or her life…

Do you believe people deserve to be given a second chance…?
When you are involved on a personal level with someone who has made an error in judgment, you will be in a position to show forgiveness, extend compassion, and give that person a second chance. In my personal opinion, we should not rely on the grace of others. Actually, we shouldn’t even bother looking back at past mistakes unless we intend to learn how to overcome them. I believe we should just move on. That’s the only way to succeed in this world. Second chances are wishful thinking. If we do come upon “a second chance,” I prefer to think of it as a new opportunity. Nothing can replace past actions, but we can learn from them, and then, we should simply move on… We asked our readers to share their thoughts on this issue...?

Lolita Derbyshire: 31, QA & Support Analyst, Paris - FRANCE
Do I believe people deserve a second chance? Sure but only if the opportunity arises. Do not go seeking it… From experience, I’ve managed to resolve past mistakes by way of being given a chance while others have simply turned me down. On the flip side, I too have been hurt, disappointed and betrayed by those close to me and a far, but I’ve always tried to keep an open mind thereby allowing them a chance to explain why and demonstrate the extent of their impertinence. The latter is an individual choice as every person has a different threshold of tolerance. I for one cannot accept any level of domestic violence while others may give the perpetrator endless “chances”.

Eman El Nouhy; 36, Senior Editor, Longman, Cairo - EGYPT
If I for a minute did not believe in a second, third, millionth chance, I would simply lay down and die! We make mistakes on daily basis, no, on minutely basis!!! If we did not make mistakes we would never learn. Mistakes are the foundation of education, and those who make more mistakes learn the most. That is why we should not only keep track of our mistakes, but we should ponder over them all the time, self-reflecting, trying to come to an understanding of why we made this mistake and whom it may have affected. By the same token, we should also reflect upon the mistakes of others, and have the compassion to forgive if we are somehow hurt. Before we judge someone’s mistakes, we need to examine the context surrounding them. Can you blame a starving child for stealing a muffin? An abused teenager for acting out? Ruling out rape, adultery, treason, and murder, (mistakes which have no remedy; therefore those who make them do not deserve a second chance and should be sentenced to death) I believe just about anything else is subject to forgiveness and penance.

Rashida Islam; 33, Mother, Brisbane - AUSTRALIA
I think the key word here is second. In a healthy relationship, the combination of your forgiveness and the other person’s remorse can, over time, strengthen a relationship. But if a person keeps messing up, you may find yourself giving that person a lot more than two chances. There is a point up to which you can keep giving a person chances, but beyond that point it starts to impact negatively on your life. That is where you need to be able to draw the line and say “enough”. Another important point to make is that there is a difference between a mistake and you will find that most give more than just one, it’s how we were made, had we given only second chances, no one would be talking to anyone. So in the end, I hate calling them second chances, they are just another chance be it second, third or even a millionth, as it depends on many factors regarding the mistake itself and the person involved. And as I said, life is not fair, you don’t get only 1 second chance, you will get many… 

Waleed Nassar; 37, State Sales Manager, Mundipharma, QLD - AUSTRALIA
In my opinion, and regardless to how difficult this may be; people deserve a second chance and I believe that if you can’t find it in yourself to do so - then look forward to the same treatment when you desire a second chance…

K.D; 35, Housewife
Yes, of course people deserve to be given a second chance; we are human beings not angels so we commit mistakes and deserve forgiveness. Our great God forgives us, so how can we not forgive each other. Even if my other significant cheated on me, I think he deserve a second chance, at least listen to his excuses and try to understand his motives and then decide whether I’m capable of forgiveness or not. Mercy is part of our nature and without it we are no different than beasts and wild animals.

M.M; 21, G.U.C graduate
Life is too short to spend it in such a way. We should listen to each other and forgive each other. But at the same time there are certain limits for everything even for forgive.

Nazih M. Achkar; 60, Operations Manager, Emergency Response Team, CANADA
In competitions, players are always given more than one try. Take the simple coin tossing even; they are given two out of three tries to declare the winner. In real life, we might not be that lucky and a second chance may never present itself. Take divorce in fact, it is quite amazing that it becomes, for some, a procedure rather than a real possibility to make a better social and emotional choice. Legally speaking, no accused is fully convicted in case it was his/her first offence. So, they are given a second choice. In religion, we are usually biased. In one of our parables, the Christ was asked if someone offended me. Shall I forgive him seven times? To that, the Christ replied: not only seven times, but seventy times seven times. Take a simple situation when your child makes the mistake more than once. Your motherly instinct is higher than any other authority. I hope this could answer your question: yes, we need always a second chance. Life is only an experience based on trials and errors.

Tiara Tennessee; 19, Economics Undergraduate, Genoa - ITALY
Second chances are not given lightly. A person can forgive but the mistakes will never truly be forgotten. It takes a lot of effort on both parties to make the relationship work again. You need to reclaim their trust and take away doubts in their hearts. The person, who was hurt, may have their guard up and boundaries must be set more clearly with what you will accept and allow back into your life. But remember, a second chance does not necessarily mean forgiveness.

D.M; 32, HR Assistant Director
Well, it depends on the kind of relationship we are having. If we are friends yes I can give a second chance, but if this is my lover or husband, no I can›t give a second chance. I would never trust him again.

Faith Hallowell; 25, IT Administrator, California - USA
I believe in second chances... I think we all need a second chance from time to time. Sometimes we screw up and then realize we were wrong. It is really up to us to decide if the person deserves a second chance, by asking ourselves - Do I really care about them? Do I want to keep them in my life? Will I be able to forgive them? Answering these questions sincerely will steer me in making my rightful decision. I choose to give a second chance so as not to harbor anger or resentment, allowing my thoughts and emotions regarding an event or circumstance to settle not be unpredictable and fluctuate. Even people accused of murder are given a second chance, we don’t just shoot them we allow them to live in prison…

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